The first 3 steps to bulletproof your relationship
Following you will find three initial steps to begin protecting your relationship from negative influences. This list is based on advice given by the teachers of The Love School and authors of Bulletproof Marriage.
1st step: Put your mind (intelligence) over your heart (feelings).
Love does not revolve around emotions; it is not based on how we feel. Love has to do with the vows made to each other and the mutual commitment in the relationship.
One of the most valuable lessons that exist is to let your intelligence and not your heart guide you. The problem is that we are bombarded daily with messages contrary to this thought. These messages come from TV programs, movies and songs. Even among businesspeople we hear the saying, “Follow your heart.” The problem with this idea is that the heart is deceitful (Jeremiah 17:9).
Would you listen to someone who is deceitful? When you follow your heart, this is exactly what you are doing. It’s a recipe to destroy your life.
Start doing what is right regardless of how you are feeling. Follow your intelligence and you will reap the good fruits of this decision.
2nd step: Recognize the threats to your relationship and protect it from them.
There is a list of situations that test the strength of a couple: an attractive person will appear at your husband’s or wife’s workplace, your relationship may become a routine, you might experience problems with your children, also your finances might greatly improve or worsen, time will test the sexual attraction of the couple, the easy access to cheat online will continue to increase (Facebook, WhatsApp, etc.), and separation and divorce will become even more common and glamorous.
But it’s not enough just to recognize the threats; protecting your relationship is fundamental. Learn to admire the qualities in your spouse. Remember that when you say “yes” to marry someone, you are saying “no” to all the others. You make a commitment that you will not seek to fulfill your affective needs with anyone else. If you are in a tempting situation with someone who seems to have the qualities that your partner is lacking, avoid that person. Minimize the contact if you are not able to avoid them completely. Never be alone together and avoid personal conversations.
Also, make an effort to change for the better. Do not be bound to excuses and say, “This is the way that I am, I’m not going to change.” Maybe it’s your way that is bringing so many problems to your relationship.
If we don’t improve in life, there is a great chance of us being overshadowed by someone better.
3rd step: Have your own culture in your marriage rather than imitating the one depicted by the media.
Who created marriage? God did. What are the rules He set up for marriage to work? So we choose to live under these rules. Do not be concerned with what other couples are doing to heat up their relationships. You are unique; find out what makes both of you happy. Protect your relationship from the rotten culture that exists out there, because it works against having a solid and strong relationship.
Did a specific situation threaten your relationship? What did you do to solve the problem? Feel free to leave your comment.
Every Thursday you have the chance of participating in the Love Therapy for couples and singles at the main branch of The Universal Church in your state. And coming soon on April 25th, we will have the Love Walk at the Central Park in New York and also in Texas and California. Don’t miss this great opportunity to invest in your relationship.ler mais